Today let me ask you one question! What is necessary for two
people to marry?
First of all they both should be humans and love each other
and the other thing they both should be of opposite sex :P
Do you think any damn thing is required apart from this? Why
parents of India don’t understand this simple logic?
I don’t understand one thing, in India where lots of battles
are fought just to make countries free, then why the hell these caste
differences? Give me one convincible logic that why Inter-caste marriage is
such an issue? Are we really free? Are we really independent?
Just because of our so called SAMAJ? Just because of our
reputation? Just because what people think of us? People will think no matter
what. They don’t spare GOD also. If something good happens they will be the first to take credit, and if something bad happens they will be the first to criticize. Do you live for those virtue less people?? Really??
Just ask yourself two simple questions!
1. Do you want to spend the rest of your life wondering what
might have been, if only you had the courage of your convictions, the courage
to stand up for what you believe in?
2. If you bowed to your parents' wishes and you went into an
arranged marriage later on, how are you going to feel ten years from now if you
found yourself in a bland marriage to somebody you simply do not love?
Indian parents are too good in black mailing their children.
And you know why? Because the blackmail WORKS!!
Things in India are never going to change until such a time as when more and
more Indians start to live the life they wanted to live, marry the person they
want to marry, be in the profession they wanted to be in etc. I am NOT
suggesting that parental advice should be discounted. However, parental control
does not have to dictate every aspect of the lives' of adult children!! If you
can choose country’s president, you should have right to choose your partner. I
mean it’s like you are capable enough to decide 1.2 billion people’s future but
not your own future! Funny!!
The choice is not really between the partner and the parent
- the choice is actually between standing the ground on your independent
decision and bending to others' expectations of you. The choice is between
having a strong spine or getting it broken forever. Remember that our choices
are what make us who we are
Dissociate yourself from the situation and think. Who
constitutes a marriage? It’s simple - just the spouses. Families and even kids
come in the outer circle, but the marriage is only about the two of you. Your
or his parents won't co-sleep on your marital bed. You are going to begin a new
life with your spouse, not parents and it is he you will have kids and
grandkids with. You are a person in your own right and not an extension of your
parents.
Even in the Indian context, you live only 20 plus years with
parents - then on, you live with your spouse for 50 plus years. Which one do
you want to count - 20 years of past or 50 years of future?
When you come to the end of your life you do not regret the
things you did but the things you never did. Any old person who has truly lived
will tell you this.
Coming to specifics, caste clashes and some very real
problems - parents disowning you, neighbors bad mouthing your family and you
etc.
Is this still worse than living the rest of your life in
regret?
My solution is, if you really are serious about getting
married to your boyfriend/girlfriend now, then go ahead and marry him. Inform
your parents and invite your friends. Apply for a personal loan or use your
savings. Get married. Don't care about who turns up or who doesn't. I know it’s
easier said than done. Our ethics won't allow us to do this. But c’mon after all its YOUR LIFE!!
I apologize if I hurt anyone’s religious sentiments or some
parents! My intentions are to convey the message that just look at the things
practically and ask yourself what you have done for YOU actually! You are here for yourself not for others.
Thank God at least animals and birds don’t follow caste
systems. In India I guess battles were fought to make creatures free not
humans! I don’t think it’s just caste, its thinking, an irreparable thinking!!
I wish anyone of you don’t end up writing some piece of
article like this! If you truly love someone go and show some courage! Believe
me its worth more than that.
Keep Reading!! :)
Love you all!! :)
